All alone

"Nina, Coffee please". I was sitting down on Appa's chair and reading Malayala manorama newspaper.
"huh". I looked up to see Maria standing in front of me
"Nina, Please make some coffee for me"
"Why should I? Why don't you make it yourself?"
"Nina" She was pleading. "You know I don't like to cook and besides you make the best coffee in the world. It taste just like Ammachi's"
"Really? My coffee really taste like Ammachi's?"
"Ofcourse it does, everyone knows that. Even Amma says you have inherited Ammachi's cooking genes!"
I was flattered to hear that. The fact that even Amma thinks I am a good cook. I got up from the chair, folded the news paper and placed it back on the chair. I was half way through the main article in the paper. I thought, I will make Maria some coffee and come back and read my paper.
I quickly made a cup of coffee for Maria and came back to find Maria sitting on the easy chair and reading the news paper.
I gave the coffe to her and asked
"Can I have the news paper now?"
"Just a little while more, I will read it quickly and give it back"
"No, I want it now, I was reading it first, I got up only because You asked me for some coffee. I want the paper now!"
"I am reading it now Nina, I will give it back when I finish"
"Oh No, You are giving it now" I pulled the paper from her hand.
Maria got up from the chair and scratched my hand with her nails. I was so mad at her, I bit her hand.Maria started to cry and my mother came outside in the nick of time.
"Amma see, Nina bit me" Maria showed the bite mark to Amma
"But she scratched me first" I replied
"Show me your hands" Amma commanded
I showed her my hand, there was only a slight redness in my hand, where as Maria had a big bite mark.
"Your sister is home for just a month and this is what you do to her. I will teach you a lesson Nina." I watched Amma going to the yard in front of the house and breaking a stem from the jasmine plant. I watched her using her hand removing the leaves and bringing the stick with her. I could have run for safety. I didn't. Amma came back to where I was standing and she hit me with the stick on my leg. It felt like a lightning passing through my leg. I didn't cry.
"Look at her, she is becoming so evil. She doesn't even cry now. Stubborn like he father." She started to hit me all over my body. I couldn't take the pain anymore and I ran. I half expected Amma to follow me and hit me some more. I ran inside the banana thicket. I couldn't sit on the floor, so I squatted down. I wanted to cry. There were red welts all over my leg and hands. I gently massaged the marks. It was stinging and tears started to flow. I thought of Akkachi and I hated Akkachi even more. If she was here, then I didn't have to get up and make coffee for my sister. There is no one for me. Nobody loves me anymore. I felt so lonely. I wished Appa would come back. The next time he calls, I intend to go to Aunty Reena's house and speak to him. I am going to tell him to come back soon, before his wife and daughter kills me.

I watched from the banana thicket and saw Amma leaving.
'Oh god, Now Maria is alone and I was really worried thatshe would hurt me again. Every time Maria is alone, she would hit me and pinch me. Amma doesn't beleive me, because by the time she returns, there is no evidence on my body to show her. I couldn't squat on the floor anymore as my kness were hurting and the ants have slowly started to climb on my legs. I quietly walked to the veranda and sat on the easy chair. If Maria comes out,I can run out to the safety of the main road.
I overheard Liza and Sally speaking to Maria
"Chechy, when are we going to get a tree to decorate?"
"Why don't you ask Nina to get one?"
"We already asked her yesterday and Nina said, ask Maria, she should get the tree" They replied
"That is because Nina is lazy. Go and tell her that Maria ordered her to get a tree. This is after all christmas time. She should be a little less lazy."
I could hear Liza and Sally walking to the veranda.
"Nina, Maria orderes you to get a tree." Liza spoke
"Oh really? Why don't you ask her to help me?"
"Nina please get a tree. Only our house doesn't have a tree. Please Nina"
I looked at my younger sisters.
"Look, I can't bring the tree alone from Baker school. It is too far. Maria has to help."
Sally was crying. "Maria says ask Nina, Nina says ask Maria and both of you are not bothered to get a tree. If Appa was here, we could have had a tree."
I knew the pain that was in my baby sisters heart. I didn't want her to cry. I will have to get a tree somehow from some where. But there was no way I could cut a tree from the Baker school compound and bring it all the way walking on the 70 feet road. That is atleast 3 KM.
"Liza, I just can't carry tree alone from the Baker school. But I can put a star for you".
"I don't want a star. I want a tree. You are just like what Maria said. You are plain lazy to do anything." Liza scoffed and walked back.
I watched Liza and Sally going back inside. There was nothing I could do. I wished my sisters understood that.

That evening was my Christmas choir concert. Akkachi had starched and ironed my white skirt and blouse. I wore the skirt and I thought of Akkachi. She is already someone's wife now. I hoped she would be happy.
"Maria, are you coming for the Carol service?" I asked Maria
"Oh No, I am not coming anywhere to hear you croaking."
"Can we come Nina?" Sally asked me
"Ofcourse you can. Go and get ready. Liza, why don't you wear your pink dress and Sally, you can wear your blue skirt and blouse. Bring me your shoes, I will polish for you"
The service starts at 6 pm.
"We will have to wait for Amma" I told my sisters. Every few m inutes I checked my watch and then the road to see if there is any sign of Amma.
I waited till 5.45pm. There was no sign of Amma.
I looked at my sisters
"I am sorry, I can't take you with me. I have to sit with the choir and won't be able to take care of you at the church. Wait here for Amma and come to church with her."
"I want to come with you Nina" Liza held my hand
I pushed her from me and ran. I could hear them crying and running after me.
"We want to attend the choir service Nina"
"Go home, go back home, please. I can't take care of you at the church, wait for Amma and come with her."
I watched my sisters walking back. I saw Liza turning back and she told me
"I hate you Nina. You cheated us. You told us, we can come with you. You are a liar"
I turned around and started to walk towards the church. I thought of my mother. She knew it is my big day today and she didn't even bother to come home on time. There was no way I could leave my sisters alone at the church while singing in the choir. Who would take care of my sisters when I am away?

The church was crowded. The Christmas tree was kept near the pulpit. Biju and his friends decorated the tree last night. There was supposed to be a big surprise for everyone. Biju and his friends were planning for weeks. I looked everywhere to see what is the big surprise. The walls were decorated with flowers and balloons. That can't be a big surprise, I thought. I noticed the big pink star in the middle of the church. Could that be the big surprise? I saw the beautifully decorated tree near the pulpit. I looked at the tree and noticed the crib at the bottom. 'Oh my goodness, that is the most beautiful crib I ever saw.It looked so beautiful, with the Joseph and Mary sitting on hay and holding the baby Jesus in their hand. There were little lambs every where and in one corner there were the statues of three Magis holding the gifts for the baby Jesus.
All my choir friends were standing with their families. Anju saw me and she ran to me
"where is your mother and sisters Nina?"
"Amma is working overtime today, she will come later with my sisters" I told her and prayed silently, Lord, Please bring Amma to the church.
"Come and meet my Ammachi. She is my father's mother. She has come to visit us from Trivandrum." Anju spoke agian and I walked with her to meet her grandmother
I noticed that everyone except me had their family at the church. All the women were dressed in beautiful sarees. Little children in beautiful frocks, most of them white colour and wearing nice shining shoes on their feet. I thought they looked like angels.
Everyone was eager for the service to start. There was so much of laughter and happiness, while I was all alone.. at the church and in the world.